At any rate, in his book, Dunning told of studies that show that sending a positive reflection of self to people is the most effective way to promote "right" action.
Let me give you an example from The Happiness Project's article (since I don't have the book), to make this theory clear:
The study "compared two classrooms of fifth graders. One class received several messages about the importance of not littering. The other class was told that it was a very neat and tidy class – the janitor told the class they were neatest class in the school, the teacher remarked on it, etc. It turns out that the second approach was much more effective in prompting the children not to litter."
This was the passage that got me to thinking: "When we're reminded of what we're doing right, and when we realize that right action is noticed and appreciated...we're encouraged to keep it up."
I personally have been utilizing this technique with my family for years, though of course not 100% of the time. Let me tell you, things go a lot more smoothly when you focus on how helpful your kids are being rather than on how slow they're moving!
I wanted to open this to you, though. Is this manipulation? Is this forcing something on people - a belief you hold that you want to push on them? Or is it simply framing someone's best qualities (or their potential) and presenting it to them as an option?
What are your thoughts?
And here's another idea. If you were to practice this habit with yourself, what would you say to YOU?
Quotations both sourced from The Happiness Project
Artwork via FFFFOUND!